Monday, June 29, 2009

he's just not that into you, a guidance for girls about man

He’s just not that into you Gals have you experienced this: a guy you crush on give some blur signs to you, or suddenly disappear from your life without prior notice, so you have to be tired of guessing does he have same feeling with you? No need to waste your time for jerk guys, recently I read a book written by a script writer of “Sex and the city” – Liz Tuccilo-- and a comedian – Greg Behrendt-- who also consultant of that script writer. The book my friend and I have read seems will be the Love Guide for Dummies J The experience : At an afternoon in July a friend of mine called me. First of all she told that she is still waiting a visa to perform her job in Numea as diplomatic staff of Indonesian government, but after that –this is the interesting story, as we quite often chat about, MEN—she told about her ex French boyfriend. This complicated guy really made her fed up. This confusing guy in some ways gives sign that he still loves her by calling her (underscore that guy lives in France) sending a birthday gift on her birthday, but then something that shocking her, he without any guilty feeling said that he will have a vacation with his girlfriend ! WHAT THE POINT ? The Guides : So gals here it comes the guides from the book, “He’s just not that in to you”. These following signs show that a guy you met just not that into you : 1. A man doesn’t really like you if he never ask you date They confess : “If we need you, we will seek” He will not let you guess since he wants to make sure that you are not frustrated and leave him. Men love hunting and chasing women. If a man asks you out, if a man is the person trying to get your attention, YOU, GALS, has the control. 2. He doesn’t / never call you : A guy sometimes say “I’m going to cal you”, but never make relationship with a guy who never keep his promise, no need wasting your time wait his call. Only give your phone number to guy who seriously want to meet you again. 3. Doesn’t want to make relationship with you : A guy who told he only want to be a friend or not ready to have relationship with you, not worth enough for you, leave this coward. Men are not different from women, they wish to be emotionally protected if a relationship go to next stage. They will express “I am your boyfriend” to a woman he likes. An Oath in relationship for women : a. No doubt b. No vagueness c. No one unknown d. Nothing express unclearly Try to know him best before make relationship with him. 4. Doesn’t want to touch you : When a man likes you, he wants to give a physical touch to you 5. Has affair with other woman when he is with you There is no good reason for an affair. Any kind of problems he should face to, do not give him right to begin a love affair. Don’t ask what mistake you ever did, an affair doesn’t happen just like that. Tell a lie, have affair, hide something is a contrary to action of a man who really loves you. 6. He wants to meet you when he drunk 7. After being together for long time, he still doesn’t want to marry you Love heal commitment phobia. “A man who had ever in relationship with you and said he never wants to marry, not believe in marriage, or has problem with marriage, WILL UNQUESTIONABLY someday marry, but certainly not with you.” Note this list: a. Do you truly feel being loved b. Do you certainly feel he is really committed with you? c. Do you certainly feel he has doubt to build life with you? If the answer : yes, yes, no, then continue your relationship with him. “Don’t want to marry” and “don’t want to marry to me” is absolutely 2 different things. If both of you has different vision on marriage, is there anything else you have different vision with him? It’s about time to make those list ! 8. He breaks relationship with you In the event he dumps you, ALWAYS BE CLASSY, NEVER BE CRAZY. Things must be done after separate from your ex boyfriend: a. no need to meet him especially has dating, b. no call c. not being close friend d. has own life. Get rid of him, erase him from your life, let him MISS you. 9. He disappears from your life. If this happen, there is no mystery (never pose question why he leaves you or ask what is your mistake so he fade away), he leaves and NOT GOOD ENOUGH for you 10. he is married man 11. He is BASTARD who selfish, always get mad, totally weird If a man truly loves someone he loves to do everything to make his girlfriend happy. Persons who love each other generally will try to do a good thing. In fact in some case there is a motivation to treat his life partner better and make his lover’s life better. All nice and mature men should try to love your family and your friends. The last thing : Make your Own standard in relationship 1. I will not make relationship with a guy who not the FIRST person who ask me for going out 2. I will not make relationship with a guy who make me wait his call 3. I will not have date with a guy who not sure he really wants to have date with me 4. I will not have a date with a guy who make me feel not unwanted physically 5. I will not make relationship with a guy who afraid of talking about our future 6. I will not, in any kind of situation, spend my valuable time with a guy who ever dumped me 7. I will not have date with a married man 8. I will not have relationship with a man who obviously not a nice person, has tender heart, and full of love


  1. bonjour..
    salam kenal mba sari, sy ivana, salah satu anggota milis indobackpacker tp ga aktif.
    backpacking masih dlm sebatas impian buat sy, but soon i want to make it real.amin^^
    kebetulan i just ended my accidentally 'relationship' with a guy that used to be my bestfriend,well, we never officially dating for some kind of reasons, boleh dibilang TTM plus LDR pula.(aduhh,maaf,jadi curcol)haha

    Membaca tulisan mba sari menyadarkan saya bahwa he's not worth to be waiting for, a guy who've been affraid of commitment for whatever reason that he had..
    well, hope that i can be classy not crazy..LOL
    thanx..hope we can be friends..
    bon journee ^^

  2. hi V,

    ada istilah di kalangan cowok, co ngga kan mau menggerakkan jempolnya kalau dia ngga benar-benar suka sama perempuannya.

    LDR boleh-boleh aja, pastikan statusnya memang masih single dan kalau belum pernah ketemu langsung jgn pernah melibatkan perasaan,, ah cowok emang gitu hehehe
    bonne journee a toi